Organized!

You all know how I am a huge slob, but how somewhere, way in the back of my brain, I get orgasmic over organization?

Well, oh holy shit, is this not the most beautiful thing you have ever seen?



Excuse me, I need to go take a cold shower...

Stuff

I spent $140 in Walmart today on classroom supplies. That's $140 spent on children who are not my own in a store that supports private school vouchers. That's private school vouchers: something that will never help my students, because they are too poor to go to a private school. It's like giving me a $25 gift certificate toward some nice Louis Vuitton luggage; thanks for nothing.

The annoying thing about Walmart is that it's just so freakin' cheap. I hate the place, but I can't stay out of it. You walk in and there is shit crammed everywhere, it's dirty, the lines are down the isles, people's kids are running around unsupervised (and in today's case, playing at vacant registers, turning the belt on and off and picking up the phone). It's aweful. For the last year or so, I was pretty good about avoiding it. I drove the extra couple miles to Target.

Sidenote: I am unsure of Target's stance on school vouchers. I googled "target school vouchers," and nothing of interest came up either way ("target" was always used as a verb). I then googled "walmart school vouchers" and got lots of negative press.

Now that I'm on my own, and you know, paying rent and bills and stuff, I have way less spendable cash. Cries of, "I will gladly pay the extra couple bucks that Target and other stores charge to avoid that shithole Walmart and to protect public education," have turned into "Whaaaat?! They want to charge how much for that??"

And so the cycle continues. People go to Walmart because the prices are low--> Smaller stores close down --> Their employees seek work at Walmart --> Walmart pays them minute wages --> They have to shop at Walmart because the prices are low

Incidentally, and kind off topic but kind but not, writing this made me sort of curious as to exactly how much of my income cycles back into classroom expenses. Since last tax season, I have collected job-related receipts that total $547.19. That does not include various book club purchases for which I do not receive a receipt (and did not think to put a copy of the cancelled check into the folder), items that were included with larger non-school related purchases, most of the candy and prize box stuff, and receipts I just forgot to file.

I wonder how much it would have cost if I bought everything at Walmart...

*****

I have discovered that you can throw a handful of frozen green beans into a skillet during the last two minutes of cooking just about anything, and they will cook up and make you feel like you are being a healty, well-rounded eater.

Last night, I finally started cooking for myself, after, oh, a month of living in my own place. It's not that I don't like to cook... I've just been busy, or going out to eat a lot, and then having leftovers from the meals out, or just snacking my way through the night, making sure to keep my stomach constantly full of string cheese, popcorn, and cookies.

But now I am officially a chef!

Meals so far:

1. Chicken and green beans with Thai yellow curry sauce over jasmine rice (This sounds fancy, but I assure you, it was not. I did cut up the chicken and brown it in a pan with the green beans, but I have Trader Joe's to thank for the simmer sauce.)
2. Lemon butter shrimp and green beans over (you guessed it) jasmine rice (Rice was leftover from last night, and the shrimp/sauce was all Gorton's.)

Meal planned for tomorrow:

• Dinner out with friends.

*****

There is a fly in my apartment and I have not yet bought a fly swatter. Nor am I really coordinated enough to actually use a fly swatter, or, for that matter, any other fly-swatterish objects such as rolled newspapers or flip flops. Flies only live for a day or two, right guys? Because the buzzing is really starting to get on my nerves.

Clapping makes my hands itch...

...so I will give a very enthusiastic Chicken Dance to the production of Lion King that Maggie and I saw at the Philadelphia Academy of Music on Friday night. The costumes and scenery and lighting were so amazing, and the actors made me forget they weren't actually, um, cartoon animals. Definitely go see it if it comes to your area!

This weekend was fun because:

• I had a visit from a northerner*
• I got to see a "Broadway" show
• I went to Jolly's Piano Bar** on 17th & Walnut, which I've been wanting to check out
• I ate all of my meals out
• I got to cuddle and watch a movie*** with Alex

I highly recommend all of these activities to someone seeking a delightfully satisfying weekend. Except, cuddle with your own honey, not mine.

* North Jersey, that is.
** black walls, pictures of pin-up girls everywhere, and a pianist playing sing-along music by the likes of Billy Joel and John Mellencamp, which people do sing along to
*** Failure to Launch

Getting to knooooow you... getting to know all abooouuuut yooouuu...

Spending a week with someone is a good way to get to know him. But it is also a good way for him to get to know you, as all of your little idiosyncrasies that you may have been trying to hide suddenly just bubble over. In my case, Alex got a few big doses of my air-headedness.


Example the First

While at a bar on the French side of the island, we were given pilsner glasses with our bottles. While I fully realized that this was smaller than a pint glass, this fact somehow escaped me as I poured out my beer. Once I reached the "fill line" on the glass, I thought to myself, "well, the glass is full... surely the bottle must be almost empty," and I tipped the bottle straight upside down to coax out the last couple drops. At which point I dumped half a beer all over my hand and the bar.

TheBoy's Reaction: Intense laughter.

Example the Second

A Bailey's Kiss sounded like the perfect dessert one night, as surely when you are stuffed to the brim, you should forego the key lime pie for the Irish cream- and Kahlua-spiked coffee (but do not pass up the sweets altogether, as that is against the Vacation Bible). I knew this drink was going to be a hot one, but when I saw the waiter walking across the room with it on a tray, in a tall, clear glass, all covered in whipped cream, I suddenly expected something more akin to a Starbucks Frappuccino. You can only imagine that immediately going in for the straw and sucking up a huge mouthful of steaming hot liquid before realizing it was hot was not such a great idea. "OHMYGODTHAT'SHOT!!!" seemed like too obvious an exclamation, so I simply sat in my chair wide-eyed and panting.

TheBoy's Reaction: An incredulous, "But you ordered a hot coffee drink..."

Example the Third

Breakfast at the hotel was a buffet. On this buffet they had this ham and cheese that, for some reason, we all became obsessed with and had to indulge in each and every morning. On our second-to-last morning, I decided that I would get crazy and make myself an open-faced ham and cheese sandwich. I piled the ham on a piece of bread, and carefully laid the cheese on top. I placed it on the conveyor belt toaster and slowed down the speed of the belt to ensure maximum cheese meltage.

Do you know what happens to the bread when it gets to the end of the conveyor belt? Apparently, it flips over and comes out opposite of how you put it in there. Except when there is gooey cheese all over the top, it just kind of sticks to the back and sliiiiides down, leaving a nice smear of Gouda along the way.

TheBoy's Reaction: A stare of disbelief and a, "That was kind of dopey..."

Also, not an example of The Spacey, but my messiness became quite apparent to him, as we shared a room. At the end of the day, his dirty clothes all went into a pile on the floor of a closet, while mine went into a pile on the floor of whereverItookthemoff. Additional messes included, but were not limited to: toiletries all over the bathroom counter, bathing suits hanging all over the shower and jacuzzi, sundry beach items (towels, books, magazines, sunscreen, etc.) around the kitchen area, and bags of candy on the "living room" table.*

The Boy's Reaction: "But your apartment isn't like this..." My Response: "Yet."

* Did I mention we were serendipitously upgraded to a suite?

Regrettably... I'm Back

So I feel like I have so much to say about my vacation and the week and how wonderfully fabulous it was and how I loved spending every second of my day and night with my man and how St. Maarten is bbeeeaaaauuuuutiful and how I ate good food and got tan and peely and drank guavaberry coladas until my heart's content and listened to Soca music and rode on a ferry to St. Barths and bobbed around in the ocean which was so clear I could see my feet and the occasional fish swimming by, but I just don't think the words will do it justice.

*****

Remember this list? Okay, so only two of my4 summer goals were completed, but that's not just 50%, my friends. That's a glass half full! Look at the two I accomplished-- Independance and Love* are decidedly more fun than exercise and writing a thesis, if you ask me.

I start back to work/school on September 5, and I will go believing that I did, in fact, have the Summer of Jess.

* That "date on Friday" I mention in my Summer of Jess post? That was Alex...

One more sleep!

But not even one more sleep, because chances are I won't sleep at all because in just a few short hours I will be showering and getting ready to drive to Alex's house where the shuttle will pick us up and take us to the airport where we will get on the plane which will take us to ST. MAARTEN!!!!!!!!



I'll drink a Margarita for you all, but the palm trees? They are all mine...

See you in a week! :o)

Plusses

I thought I would really miss my family when I moved out... and sometimes I do get a little lonely. But you know what was nice? After eating dinner at my parents' house Sunday night, I got to leave. I hope that doesn't sound mean-- I do love my family and spending time with them. But just when it got to the point where I'd normally just go into my little bedroom and hibernate for a few hours, I got to get in my little Civic and drive to an entire apartment that is just my own.

• Where I walk around naked sometimes (WITH the blinds closed!)
• Where I fuss with the tissue box to make sure the seam is in the back
• Where I fluff the pillows on the furniture I bought with my own money
• Where I eat cereal with low fat Coffeemate because milk goes sour too quickly
• Where I get 11pm booty calls with no shame (because, hey, he's my boyfriend)
• Where I still have not unpacked my bedroom
• Where I say, mostly to myself, "Sorry, Lady Downstairs," when I drop something heavy
• Where I think of things I'd like to do to spiffy up the place (new obession: strips on which to hang my pots and pans, a' la Beth & Merideth's kitchen- A trip to IKEA had me thinking about it already, but that pic sealed the deal.)
• Where I hang a list on the fridge of things for Dad to help me with next time he comes over (ex: mount coffee pot under cabinets, hang shelving for S&P shaker collection)
• Where I call Mom at least once a day to ask a question about something

Stoooopid.

Would Direct Loans please freaking stop sending me notices that they are increasing my monthly payments?!? Aren't you supposed to pay off student loans at like $100 a month for the rest of your life? Because I'd definitely prefer that right now to the $300 per month they keep closing in on as I continue to run up my credit card bill and wait for my September 15th paycheck!

Hmph.

Meet the Parents

I have been dating Alex for about 6 weeks now and he has still not met my parents. This is not intentional. He works late, and so when I lived at home and he wasn't coming to pick me up until 9 or 10 at night, I'd tell him to just call me from the driveway to keep the dog from barking and waking up my dad. Other times, we just met up where we were hanging out, or I drove to his house and left my car there if where we were going was closer to there. I met his dad because we did the weekend shore thing, but that wasn't really an On Purpose meeting... it just so happens that his dad owns the house, but really Alex and I just went to chill down the shore.

I've been trying to avoid the whole Meet the Parents thing-- you know, big dinner with Mom and Dad where all eyes are on Alex and he has to keep trying to say things that will impress them, charm them, and ensure them that he is not out to break my heart. I wanted it to just be causal. Kind of a Hey here is Alex, why don't you talk to him for a few minutes, and isn't he cute and now we must be on our way as we've got something very exciting to go do.

Yeah, well that never ended up happening and now I have my own place, and there is absolutely no reason for Alex to meet my parents other than the sole reason of Alex Meeting My Parents. Mom has threatened that if she doesn't meet him sometime this week, she will stalk us at the airport before we leave for St. Maarten because what if I don't come back and she has to tell the police I don't know who she went with or what he does or what his name is or what he looks like. (She definitely knows at least 3 of these 4... and probably even all 4, as she has seen a pic.)

Yesterday Alison came to visit, and we mooched dinner at my parents' house (ha! My Parents' House! Not mine, as I have my own!!!!), and Alison suggested that my mom invite the two of us (Alex and me) over for dinner. Mom's response: "Or maybe I can just stop by Jess' apartment tomorrow morning and bring them breakfast in bed!!!! [hmph.]" Snarky.

*****

Alex and I went to Atlantic City again on Saturday night, and Alex struck it big this time on the Monopoly slots-- $500 big! Although when you consider the fact that we ate a $100 dinner (hey- most of that was from him- he ordered the filet mignon and two or three coctails as compared to my modest mahi mahi dish and one mango mojito!) and that he kept shoving 20's into the Power Ball nickel slot I was playing because damn it! we want to play the bonus game you stupid casino money maker!, he probably only came out even or maybe $1-200 up. Which is still pretty awesome.

*****

So the description of my blog reads, "Observations and anecdotes of a curly-haired, single, twenty-something special ed teacher who lives with her parents." Except I'm not single anymore and I don't live with my parents anymore, and "Observations and anecdotes of a curly-haired, twenty-something special ed teacher with a boyfriend and her own apartment," doesn't sound so interesting. Y'all are good writers. Any suggestions?

WOOHOO!!! or, Why My Summer is Awesome

1. I moved this weekend, and I love my apartment* and my furniture and that I can walk around naked and pee with the door open... even if I did notice yesterday that when I pee with the door open, the people across the courtyard from me probably get a pretty good view of my vajayjay. (Note to self: close either blinds or door when using bathroom.)
2. I went into a candy store in my new town today and the lady talked my ear off and gave me a free peanut butter oreo chocolate covered pretzel. Then I walked down the street and got a Philly roll from the suggested "best Chinese place in town." The sushi was great eventhough the restaurant isn't Japanese.
3. Only two weeks of this class left, and then one more and then I don't have to take another class again everinmylife unless I want to, just for fun.
   
4. I am falling in l.... Okay, I can't say it yet.
5. In 12 days I will be here with Alex and his family! I have never been before and it looks so beautiful and fun and I can't wait to spend an entire week tanning and eating and drinking and snorkeling and sleeping and shopping!! kjsdbdfljasbflbsdivbiuciu!!!!!

* Though adorable while in it, in pictures my place still looks unfinished. I'll post when I get some pictures on the walls!