Couldn't Resist

I meme'd myself because I found myself writing so much in response to Metalia's quiz, I figured I might as well just write an entry.

1. Are the children of the world working your last nerve with their devil wheelie shoes?

I suppose it is a little annoying when your path is abruptly cut off by a child gliding around on shoes with wheels, and truth be told, they remind me a little of the Wicked Witch's flying monkeys, erm, except they don't fly... But I find it hard to be angry AND jealous at the same time. *sigh*

2. If you came across this product while food shopping, would you purchase it?
Probably not. Although I am drawn to guacamole-flavored things, I am not so into the spicy. And P.S. I am still mad at Alison for comparing me to Sandra fecking Lee when I made my own guacamole out of an avocado and a blob of salsa. What?? Salsa is made of all the ingredients you'd add to guac! And it's all I had! And, and, I needed to be eating guacamole, damn it!

3. Are you irked by the current trend of referring to all things environmentally friendly as “green” ? (Suck it, “green” toothpicks. You’re not green. Come talk to my chartreuse Pringles! Which are weirdly delicious, by the way.)

This is going to make people hate me, but I am irked by anything environmentally sound. In fact, if I can find a way to pollute the earth, chances are, I will take advantage of it. For example, I buy disposable coffee cups so I don't have to wash an insulated mug everyday. Refill a Brita pitcher full of water all the time? Yeah right, my fridge is full of bottled water. And also about 10 non-biodegradable Styrofoam leftover containers.

4. After noting that your total purchase exceeded $500, would you still return your shopping cart to the locking chain thing to retrieve your goddamn quarter? (In case you’re unfamiliar, some stores require you to put a quarter into the cart to “unlock” it from the other carts to which it’s chained.)

Yes, but not because of the quarter. For some reason, as lazy as I noted above, I am a stickler about returning the cart to the designated area. We don't have the chain things, but I always feel a twinge of guilt if my cart disengages from the other carts, sending it off across the parking lot, and into someones bumper. I'm thoughtful like that...

5. Let's say you saw Days of Thunder by the register on the “$9.99 or less!” DVD rack, enticing you with its nostalgic packaging, and your own cherished memories of Tom Cruise (a.k.a. one Mr. Cole Trickle) uttering such gems as, “Speed…To be able to control it. To know that I can control something that's out of control." Would you strongly consider buying it, rather than walking on by like a normal person? (Note: Logic prevailed, and I refrained, but the question is, would you consider it.)

Make it Risky Business, and you've got yourself a deal.

In The Spirit, Eventhough I Hate Halloween

Claire tagged me. I'm humoring her.

1. What's the scariest movie you've ever seen?
Believe it or not, it was Cabin Fever, but mostly because the cabin looked/felt so much like Meg's cabin, and we were going there a few weeks later, and I was scared we were going to be attacked by a decomposing man with a flesh-eating virus who ran at us from the woods spewing blood. Or, at the very least, I thought we might run into a rabid Gunk.

2. What was your favorite Halloween costume as a child?
I don't remember ever being absolutely in love with one of my costumes. To this day, I hate the whole process of dressing up. I never felt like I looked real enough... then I got to college, and I never felt like I looked slutty enough... and now I'm an adult and I never feel like I look... well... I guess it's gone back to the real enough thing again.

3. If you had an unlimited budget, what would your Fantasy Costume be for this Halloween?
An around-the-world traveler. All authentic-like, with an actual itinerary and plane/hotel reservations and everything!

4. When was the last time you went trick or treating?
Yeah... I want to say there was some trick-or-treating my freshman or sophomore year in high school. That's when Kelly and I became friends again, because we were both M&Ms. Yeah, we were actually so cool that we were trick-or-treating. as high-schoolers. as M&Ms. Both of us.

5. Whats your favorite halloween candy?
Candy corn, Baby!!!!

6. Recount a scary nightmare you had.
The first one coming to mind is from a long time ago, probably in high school or middle school, in which there was a gang of green mohawked punk rockers outside of my house vandalizing my car and trying to break in. I kept trying to get my mom to do something, but she wouldn't. She just ran around the house putting up Caution Tape so they'd think it was a crime scene and go away.

7. What is your supernatural fear?
I am reading Rohld Dahl's The Witches to my class right now. My supernatural fear is that my lack of toes and hair, enlarged nostrils, blue spit, and extra-long claws are not symbols of my Witchhood, but actually just birth defects.

8. What is your creepy crawlie fear?
Oh god maggots. [gag. GAG. DRY HEAVE!!!]

9. Tell us about a time you saw a ghost, or heard something go bump in the night.
Once I heard Alex step on one of my upside-down high heels... That woke me up alright...

But honestly, I've never had an experience that has made me believe I'm around anything supernatural.

10. Would you ever stay in a real haunted house overnight?
Yeah, but not alone. And not because I'm scared of it being haunted. I don't even like when I'm trying to sleep and my dishwasher is on. Those noises creep me out. Intruders, you know.

11. Are you a traditionalist (just a face) or do you get really creative with your pumpkins?
I think it's fun to carve them out and stuff, but I think they are pretty just un-carved too. Plus I'm lazy.

12. How much do you decorate your home for halloween?
Not at all, but I have a few things aroud my classroom.

13. what do you want on your tombstone?
Here lies Jess
She was a mess
Now she rests dead
In a dirty bed

Hey, Janie and billjimjackjoebob, you girls are it! Mwaaahahahahaaaaaa!!!!