Page Lickers
So I’m at class tonight, and this girl is giving a presentation, and as she flips through her notes, she’s all… Lick thumb, turn page, lick thumb, turn page, begin to talk, lick thumb mid-sentence, complete sentence, realize thumb is now dry, lick thumb again, turn page… and I just don’t get it.
Seems to me I’ve successfully turned lots of pages in my life with fingers that were not covered in my saliva, and honestly? I really find the whole process of wet-turning pages pretty disgusting.
I think more than anything, it’s just a habit. Someone sees someone else page-licking, they think they’ll give it a try, and they like the way the page just sticks to the moistened tip of their finger, and they then become a chronic wet-turner.
All Page-Lickers, imagine this:
You borrow a book from the library. You feel too lazy to separate the pages the dry way, so you stick out your tongue, dab your middle finger, and turn the page. And then you do it again. And again.
Okay that’s not SO gross. But you know what is? That the person who borrowed the book before you probably did it too. And now you’ve gone and refreshed their spit with your spit, and the two spits have mixed together and now you’ve gone and put the spit-mix in your mouth.
Really? Ew.
Seems to me I’ve successfully turned lots of pages in my life with fingers that were not covered in my saliva, and honestly? I really find the whole process of wet-turning pages pretty disgusting.
I think more than anything, it’s just a habit. Someone sees someone else page-licking, they think they’ll give it a try, and they like the way the page just sticks to the moistened tip of their finger, and they then become a chronic wet-turner.
All Page-Lickers, imagine this:
You borrow a book from the library. You feel too lazy to separate the pages the dry way, so you stick out your tongue, dab your middle finger, and turn the page. And then you do it again. And again.
Okay that’s not SO gross. But you know what is? That the person who borrowed the book before you probably did it too. And now you’ve gone and refreshed their spit with your spit, and the two spits have mixed together and now you’ve gone and put the spit-mix in your mouth.
Really? Ew.
posted by Jess at 7:53 PM
4 Comments:
Oh God, I HATE this!
And Partner does it! I spend a lot of time thinking about the disgustingness of it all.
i think page-lickers should just open their mouths and let other page-lickers spit right into it. maybe then they would learn their lesson and stop antagonizing the rest of us.
I had this social studies teacher in seventh grade, a one Mr Grace, who was a thumb-licking page turner. Not only did he leave his spit all over our papers and tests, he also left behind a yellow-brown thumb print, due to his almost life-time smoking habit. So, if you were able to repress the idea of his spit on your page, he made certain you remembered because those prints were not going anywhere. Mmmmmmmm.
Ugh! This has made me remember the time I was a kid when we were served in the local grocers by a woman who licked her finger to turn over a plastic sheet to put the ham in she'd just served us. The reason I remember it is that I was sooo embarrassed at my mother who complained so loudly, demanding to see the shop manager, that we had a crowd of spectators!! From then on, my mother always referred to the shop assistant who served us that day as The Licker. I still remember exactly what The Licker looked like.
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