In a Rut

Guys? How do you get out of a rut? And I’m talking about a serious still-not-finished-capstone-don’t-feel-like-going-to-work-still-living-with

-parents-while-almost-at-my-25^th-birthday-and-still-without-a-good-
man-while-gaining-weight-by-the-minute rut. Combine all this with a first-year-of-teaching sinus infection that hasn’t gone away in months to achieve a real lack of motivation to fix any of these things despite their unpleasantness. It’s true that all of these things do or can have a resolution and end in sight, but that part is boring, so feel free to skip the rest if you want. In fact, I’ll make it in smaller font so you don’t feel compelled to read it.

• Capstone must be complete by May
• Only 4 months left until summer break
• Moving out this summer (I have been saying this every summer since college. This time I really mean it!)
• Could be looking harder for a man, as teaching in a school with women means I don’t have access to many men in a natural setting, and I’m not open to set-ups by colleagues. A woman I worked with last year convinced me to go on a date with her son. He was nice enough, but not for me. I didn’t know how to get out of it, so I didn’t return his phone calls and avoided her for the rest of the year.
• Yeah. We know there is lots I could be doing about the weight gain, and this does not include eating school lunches and sitting around watching TV all night. And let’s not talk about the 30+ personal trainer sessions that I have saved up since I started paying for them and not going in August.
• I probably should be on antibiotics, but I just can’t bring myself to fight with the bitchy receptionist over appointment times, use one of my 20-minute comp passes to get out of work early to make the appointment, and then sit in the waiting room for 45 minutes, and the exam room for 30 minutes, only to have the doctor come in, spend 90 seconds looking in my ears and up my nose, and tell me what I already know: You have a sinus infection and need antibiotics. I can diagnose myself even without the master’s degree, and you spent all that time and money on med school? Unfortunately, a BA doesn’t give me a little blue pad of prescription paper.